Natasha’s Blog – My journey to find Me

Blog, Weight, Mum, Natasha

Natasha’s Blog

My Personal Blog – My journey to find Me

2 1/2 years into my diet …

It was now or never…the next step was joining a gym. I booked to have a tour around a well-known gym. I was so nervous walking up to the reception desk; I gave my name and the lady said, ‘take a seat, Sammy will be over with you shortly.’ My heart was pounding; I really
needed to take control of how scared I was feeling. Why was I so worried, it was only a gym!

‘Hi Natasha, my name’s Sammy. I will be showing you around this morning; please feel free to ask any questions along the way, it should only take 20 to 30 minutes. Ok, let’s go.’

He took me round; it was super-duper – had all the latest modern exercise machines where you could watch tv, listen to music etc. In the corner of my eye, I clapped eyes on two ladies on the stepper machine: hair perfect, makeup perfect…I thought, WHAT?? Where’s the sweat? Where’s
the puffing and bright red faces?!!

Sammy turned to me and said, ‘Don’t worry, we get a few of them in! We call them the bored housewives, with nothing better to do than gossip or flirt.’
I felt my face turn red, but he did make me smirk a bit. What world was I about to step into… was I ready, could I do this, was this the right place for me? I’m sure most gyms are all the same. My husband thought I was becoming rather anxious about it all. He said to me, ‘Lets’ go, let’s both join.’ He’d wanted to get back into the gym for a while, and it was his way of showing me support. He said, ‘There’s this gym on the industrial estate.’
I thought I’m not going to any body-building, back-street gym. What will they think of me? I don’t want to build muscles, I want to get fit!
I put it off for a few days, then hubby said, ‘Let’s go. If you don’t come and look today, I’m going on my own.’ So, we went and in the allocated parking area for the gym, I said:

‘You go in first then come out and get me if it’s not too full, and if there are lots of men just leave me here and you join on your own.’

When I read back my blog, I think how bloody stupid I was! Why did I feel like this? I’d be the first to say to someone to go out and get it, you can do it!! But there was me, sitting in the car feeling sick… Not only did my husband come out the gym doors but another man was with him. I thought, oh they must know each other. Shit, they’re both walking to the car. My heart was pounding!! I’m going to kill him, I thought. My husband hand gestured me to get out of the car. Thoughts in my mind were whirling. I really am going to kick his ass when I get home.

‘Hi, my name’s Andy. Your husband tells me you want to have a look around the gym? Are you interested in joining? What is it you’re looking for?’
‘Um, um, um, um, I’ve lost some weight and I want to get fit. I think this is the next stage?’

Well, it was the best thing my husband ever did and no, I didn’t kick his ass when we got home! This gym was perfect for me. Yes, there were a few bodybuilders but there were older folk, young, mixed sizes…I liked it. The staff were amazing, really encouraging. Over the weeks I went with my husband, never on my own. I was starting to build up the confidence. I was asking Andy or Ben questions about the machines and how they would
benefit me. I listened and took note of everything they said. On one occasion, I overheard a group of gym members talking about a mud run. I thought, one day I would love to be fit enough to do one of those. Andy started giving me personal training lessons. I was really noticing the shape of my body changing and I was feeling a lot more energetic. Andy asked questions about my life and over time, he learnt of my journey. I was opening up a lot easier and my confidence was growing.

I started off with a walking pace…in to a slight jog…I’m going to run, I’m going to run so fast! I have got this…

Read my previous blogs here: http://www.mamalifemagazine.co.uk/category/blog/

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